Even the darkness is not dark to you...
Apparently God speaks to us humans. I'm sceptical. Always have been and always will be. Anyone who claims to have heard from God immediately sets off my highly sensitive nutbag/manipulator/deluded/dangerous alarm. However, here I am, starting a blog because God told me to.
In my youth my aim was to read the Bible everyday. I had a Quiet Time where I read the bible, prayed, kept a journal. Most of us who were Christians in the 80's and/or 90's know what I'm talking about. QTs were a non-negotiable. These days, as a parent and as a tired grown-up person, I yearn for the simple notion that my spiritual health was guaranteed by a QT. I estimate now that I open my bible (App) once a month.
Sunday morning was the once in August. I use the app DVO when I do get around to reading the bible and the topic for the day was God being with us everywhere, and the associated reading was Psalm 139.
So, it was nice to read again this particular Sunday morning. Darkness has been hanging around in 2018 and I have been feeling the chill.
Then at church the same day, our kids church ran the worship part of the service. They focused on the story of Jonah, who thought it would be a good idea to hide from God when he was asked to do something he did not fancy doing. This led to the bottom of the ocean, a pretty dark and human-unfriendly environ. God, in God-style, rescues Jonah by booking him a seat inside the belly of a fish. Nice. God was with Jonah. God was with Jonah in what must have been a smelly, slimey, squishy place. And dark. Really dark.
Even in our darkest time and place, whether by choice, consequence, circumstances beyond our control, or even by plain old despondency and boredom, God knows what is going on and offers himself. This dark fish-belly place is both a place of refuge and a place of death and preparation. From here we can be spat out onto dry land, with yet another chance at life.
Chances and second-chances have been endlessly and generously heaped upon me. Most things I initiate in response to God's call end up ended-up. Most changes I resolve to implement end up failing. I'm talking ministry, career, parenting, health and fitness, spirituality. These days I avoid the acts of initiating, resolving, committing, starting, so that I can avoid the self-loathing disappointment when it doesn't stick.
So what was God doing on Sunday through Psalm 139, Jonah and our pastor who firmly challenged me in his sermon to use our gifts to serve God and his people? God reminds me how I love to write. How I love to encourage and build up his people. He reminds me of all I have learned in the darkness. Reminds me that even in the darkness, He is light. God spoke to me that Sunday, and for a change, I think I'll listen.
And so this blog is born. I think I will use it to remind myself, and hopefully a few others, of the brightness, the intensity, the lightness, and the warmth that comes from having God, Emmanuel, with me. With me in the belly of the fish.
In my youth my aim was to read the Bible everyday. I had a Quiet Time where I read the bible, prayed, kept a journal. Most of us who were Christians in the 80's and/or 90's know what I'm talking about. QTs were a non-negotiable. These days, as a parent and as a tired grown-up person, I yearn for the simple notion that my spiritual health was guaranteed by a QT. I estimate now that I open my bible (App) once a month.
Sunday morning was the once in August. I use the app DVO when I do get around to reading the bible and the topic for the day was God being with us everywhere, and the associated reading was Psalm 139.
Sometime in the rough 'n tumble of my 20's, life was not going so great and I found myself in a dark place. I came across this verse back then and it prompted the one and only painting I've ever done, the yellow one leading this blog. This image and verse have stayed with me and in those moments when despair has a winning margin, it often pops into my head and is the pilot light to God's warmth....even the darkness is not dark to you, the night is as bright as the day, for darkness is as light to you. Psalm 139:11
So, it was nice to read again this particular Sunday morning. Darkness has been hanging around in 2018 and I have been feeling the chill.
Then at church the same day, our kids church ran the worship part of the service. They focused on the story of Jonah, who thought it would be a good idea to hide from God when he was asked to do something he did not fancy doing. This led to the bottom of the ocean, a pretty dark and human-unfriendly environ. God, in God-style, rescues Jonah by booking him a seat inside the belly of a fish. Nice. God was with Jonah. God was with Jonah in what must have been a smelly, slimey, squishy place. And dark. Really dark.
Even in our darkest time and place, whether by choice, consequence, circumstances beyond our control, or even by plain old despondency and boredom, God knows what is going on and offers himself. This dark fish-belly place is both a place of refuge and a place of death and preparation. From here we can be spat out onto dry land, with yet another chance at life.
Chances and second-chances have been endlessly and generously heaped upon me. Most things I initiate in response to God's call end up ended-up. Most changes I resolve to implement end up failing. I'm talking ministry, career, parenting, health and fitness, spirituality. These days I avoid the acts of initiating, resolving, committing, starting, so that I can avoid the self-loathing disappointment when it doesn't stick.
So what was God doing on Sunday through Psalm 139, Jonah and our pastor who firmly challenged me in his sermon to use our gifts to serve God and his people? God reminds me how I love to write. How I love to encourage and build up his people. He reminds me of all I have learned in the darkness. Reminds me that even in the darkness, He is light. God spoke to me that Sunday, and for a change, I think I'll listen.
And so this blog is born. I think I will use it to remind myself, and hopefully a few others, of the brightness, the intensity, the lightness, and the warmth that comes from having God, Emmanuel, with me. With me in the belly of the fish.
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